Glaiel-Gamer 2010-12-16 14:46:18

i have no dog and it died because nobody gave me money

Glaiel-Gamer 2010-12-16 15:19:43

no comment

Glaiel-Gamer 2010-12-16 17:52:31

I'll have to start at the beginning for this one. About 13 billion years ago, all matter was compressed into a singular point of infinite density and extreme heat. It then exploded and the universe began to expand, cooling as it did so. Early stars developed from the cosmological soup. At a point, the universe was cold enough for heavy atoms to form from the remains of supernovas of aging stars, which then collected together to form planets. One of these planets was Earth, which we're all familiar with. Which brings us to 4 billion years ago. Earth was a planet with liquid oceans and lots of rich elements like carbon and nitrogen in that primordial soup. Something caused a few of these elements to react together and form the first living cell on earth. It reproduced again and again, sometimes resulting in a mutation. Not all mutations were detrimental, however, and the beneficial ones survived longer and reproduced more, eventually leading to more complex organisms. This led to fish, then reptiles and dinosaurs and birds, then mammals, and eventually homo sapiens (more commonly known as human, like you and me). We had cognitive abilities unmatched by other creatures, and the opposable thumbs capable of manipulating the environment to our will. We used these abilities to develop math and science and engineering, and through thousands of years of collective research, eventually developed the first electrical computer in the mid 1900s. Eventually, people realized that this pinnacle of technological accomplishment was super useful for providing mindless entertainment, so video games were invented. Atari made a home console, then nintendo took their place. Then sega challenged nintendo, and lost. Then sony challenged nintendo, and won. Then microsoft challenged both of them, and tied. Then nintendo challenged them to a revenge match with the wii, and kicked their ass. Microsoft is still doing well and sony is too however. In the midst of all this, the Internet was invented (by none other than Al Gore himself), newgrounds was started, and I began learning to program, with my first game Pigeon Pooper (which was sold to Bungie last january). All of this led up to the creation of Closure in 2009.

TL;DR version:
Jesus

Glaiel-Gamer 2010-12-16 22:37:29

Russia, cause nobody else pours vodka on cheesecake like they do